POINT: I can’t believe the Canucks lost, this is the worst thing that has ever happened to me!
by Joseph Stephens, Upset Hockey Fan
I can’t believe this has happened. Out in four games? Not even a single win? This has got to be the most upset I’ve ever been in my entire life!
Now, I know I haven’t always been the best fan . . . I know I’ve ignored the Canucks sometimes . . . only half-paid attention during regular season games, never bothered to learn that new defenceman’s name, hell, I still don’t know even which Sedin is which, but I still love them, you know.
And now I’m going to have to live without them for 5 whole months? What the hell am I going to do? Sure, I might have criticized them from time to time this season but I didn’t want them to go away so soon!
I’ve dedicated so much of my life to this team and they’ve sacrificed so much for me.
And now, I’m lost. What am I supposed to do without them? Watch basketball? Soccer? One of the remaining dozens of hockey games between other teams? Literally anything else I want to do?
I can’t believe how much it hurts to not have them around! I feel like a part of me is missing, almost like I’ve lost a close friend or relative!
God this is the worst pain ever! Why couldn’t you have just hit that empty net in game 2 Burrows? Maybe then the Canucks could still be with me and I could just go back to being happy without the burden of your loss weighing over me, haunting me!
They were the most important thing in the world and now they’re gone! This is definitely the worst thing that is EVER going to happen to me!
COUNTERPOINT: Oh, then I guess this is a good time to tell you about your father…
Hello Mr. Stephens, I’ve been trying to get in touch with you for about a couple of days now. This is really hard to tell you but it seems like now is as good of a time as ever.
Your father is dead.
I know you’ve been very busy recently and haven’t been able to come visit him but his health quickly deteriorated in the last week and we lost him.
He seemed to know the inevitable was coming too, and was acting very sentimental. He kept telling stories about his life that he said he had never told anyone before. He tried calling you to say a final goodbye at seven o’clock Monday but I guess you must have had a really important meeting or something because you never answered.
Anyway, he told us about your guys’ relationship and how you never really connected, and he really wanted to fix that before he died but I guess that’s impossible now.
And then, on Wednesday the cancer moved into his brain. It’s hard to say what exactly happened; we thought we had it in control. I guess we must have just made a tiny mistake. You know, it was kind of like that game 4 overtime goal Cory Schneider let in.
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up a touchy subject and I can see that you realized how upset you are about your father’s passing when I said that.
Your dad loved you Joseph. He would’ve been delighted to have had the chance to have seen you before he died but he asked us to pass on this message.
He said, “Dear Joseph, I am so proud of you. You really have grown into a handsome, wonderful, mature adult who really has his priorities straight in life. I love you.”
