HUMOUR
Horoscopes June 24 – 30
June 24, 2024By: Amrit Kamaal, Peak Associate Aries March 21–April 19 You totally fell for the Sonny Angel epidemic. You couldn’t resist the cuteness and just bought one, telling yourself it’ll be good for the economy. Soon, you thought it wouldn’t hurt to give it a friend. Now, every corner of your room, kitchen shelves, and attic are all taken over by tiny angel babies. Taurus April 20–May 20 You guys will find beauty in the unappreciated, seeking out the figurines nobody wants, AKA Robby from Sonny Angels. To y’all, Robby is the only character in the Sonny Angel universe, buying over…
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Peakie is here to answer your queeries
June 19, 2024By: Cam Darting, Peak Associate and C Icart, Humour Editor Dear Peakie, I have given birth to so many children you’d think I was Little John’s wife! No galvanized steel is needed for me, though; I prefer to work on…
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Move out of the way cisheteros, it’s not about you this month
June 19, 2024By: Cam Darting, SFU Student I think it’s time to move to a different city and start anew. Everyone around me is a fake ally. It’s been 4,320 minutes since May turned into June, and nobody has wished me a…
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Horoscopes June 17 – June 23
June 17, 2024By: Cam Darting, Peak Associate Aries March 21–April 19 Anything but a G-string As an Aries, you’re fun, energetic, and the life of the party. At Pride, you’ll be jumping up and down, dancing, and because of this, we need…
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Inter Miami tells Whitecaps fans to grow up
June 13, 2024By: Kristina Ronalda, Florida Woman To the fans in Vancouver, We are deeply sorry for the hurt feelings and wallets of all the fans who anxiously awaited the arrival of the world’s best footballer, just to be met with disappointment.…
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An SFU background extra tell-all
June 13, 2024By: Petra Chase, Editor-in-Chief SFU students have been observing a strange phenomenon across campuses — more and more common areas filled with students just hanging out. At first, The Peak assumed it was some conspiracy. But the tips have been…
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Your pain is your endometriosis’ gain
June 13, 2024By: Cynthia Piña, Peak Associate Content warning: mention of blood, graphic description of laproscopic surgery. Hi!!! I’m endometriosis, and I’m not going to leave you alone :) My life’s work is growing excess tissue and nothing will stop me —…
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Horoscopes June 10 – 16
June 13, 2024By: Amrit Kamaal, Peak Associate Aries March 21–April 19 You’re built completely different. Look at you getting last-minute candy in the Burnaby campus vending machine room, which is a real room solely dedicated to vending machines. You also made…
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It’s been 84 years since you opened my app
June 5, 2024By: Kaja Antic, Staff Writer My dear friend, Oh, how I miss you dearly. My algorithm yearns for your endless searches for queer shows that get cancelled after one season. Who am I supposed to recommend true crime documentaries to…
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Autocorrect is so high on itself it thinks it’s correct
June 5, 2024By: Hailey Miller, Staff Writer Content warning: vinegar language. Correction: vulgar. Dear fellow victims of autocorrect fascinations frustrations, If autocorrect is the bane of your existence like it is mine, we’re bound to be fiends! Oops, I mean friends. Don’t…
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