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New posters really going to spruce up never-visited dorm room

BURNABY —  With SFU’s semesterly Imaginus Poster Sale in full swing, a local first-year student believes that he has found the perfect selection of decorations to liven up the dorm room that only he has ever seen.

According to his own testimony, Harry Watson, who lives in a tiny, awful room in Towers purchased the “perfect collection” of posters that represent all his hobbies and interests, and can’t wait for them to be enjoyed by himself, the only one who ever spends any time there.

“I got a Dark Knight poster to show that I love films, a Bob Marley one because I’m a huge music-nerd, and this Che Guevara one because I’m a really into t-shirts,” Watson explained, going through his $89.99 receipt. “If anyone ever came to my dorm, I think they’d really have a good sense of who I am.”

While Watson still hasn’t finished mounting them all to the wall, he says the posters have really made his place look a lot nicer and believes they’ll inspire a fair number of conversation starters he imagines while lying there alone.

“I used to just stay in that room by myself all night, depressed, staring at the walls,” he told The Peak solemnly. “That’s all behind me now . . . now I can stare, depressed, at a life-sized image of Lebron James instead!”

While Watson is very impressed by the selection of posters he was able to acquire at the Imaginus sale, he doesn’t think that he is done decorating.

“Now that I see how it looks with a couple things up on the wall, I just want to keep adding stuff to really give it a cool vibe that will attract me to stay here at all times,” he said, flashing a huge grin. “Soon you won’t even be able to see the walls . . . well not you, but I won’t be able to see the walls.”

When asked at press time what accessories he was considering adding to the dorm, Watson didn’t know for sure but mentioned the possibility of either getting a cactus, a lava lamp or a decorative noose.

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