Burger King
Burger King seizes Tim Hortons through Red Wedding-style acquisition
EIC September 8, 2014On August 26, in a move that no one could have possibly predicted — except maybe economists who have already read the books — the House of American fast-food giant Burger King announced their acquisition of Tim Hortons through a bloodied massacre. The acquisition, which is being referred to as the Bread Wedding, reportedly cost $11.5 billion and will secure the company as the third-largest quick-service restaurant chain in all of Westeros. “We’re very excited to announce the almost complete eradication of Tim Hortons, who I think we can all agree had it coming,” a spokesperson for Burger King told…
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Tim Hortons should be kept Canadian
EIC September 8, 2014I am in a flurry of motion. Tapping my feet, checking my watch every 0.62 seconds, I throw several anxious glances at the customs officer. Come on. I have a bus to catch at noon, and it’s already 11:40 a.m.…
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