“My body posture can be described as ‘C-3P0 Riding a Horse.’”
“I have a pretty great workout regime: 15 reps at the water fountain, and then I do hardcore dips. My favourite is the honey mustard.”
“Working three jobs is great because now I have plenty of things to cry about in my car.”
“It’s hard to see myself living in a big house one day without a mirror.”
“It’s the small joys in life that make it interesting, like finding a five dollar bill in your pocket, or that look of disgust the cashier at Forever 21 gives you when you ask her if she needs to see your ID.”
