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Study: Depression affects 10 out of 10 worthless people

A new study from a group of self-proclaimed “failure” scientists has found that 10 out of 10 waste of space human beings suffer from some sort of mental depression. This data was collected after a 12-year study in which all of these same scientists were the test subjects.

While they have not been able to explain why depression seems to be so common among so-called “pieces of trash excuses for humanity,” the scientists did say that information could probably be found by researchers who weren’t “utterly hopeless.” They also stated that decent scientists could’ve come to this conclusion after only a few hours instead of 12 years and that they should probably just go to bed and stop trying to do science. 

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Threats to water security trigger emergency declaration by syilx Okanagan Nation

By: Tomos Land, Staff Writer Editor’s note: The Peak spells nsyilxcən words in lowercase in accordance with syilx language holders who say that capitalization implies a hierarchy of importance, which does  not align with syilx ethics.  Growing water insecurity, driven by climate change and its cascading effects in BC, has led to a recent declaration of a watershed emergency by the syilx Okanagan Nation Alliance (ONA). The alliance is a First Nations government “comprised of seven member communities in the Southern Interior of BC: Okanagan Indian Band, Osoyoos Indian Band, Penticton Indian Band, Upper Nicola Band, Upper and Lower Similkameen Indian Bands, and Westbank First Nation; and in Northern Washington State, the Colville Confederated Tribes,” according to the ONA website. The announcement comes after members of...

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