By: Your Friendly Neighbourhood Duck Another year, another splash. It’s fall semester again, and we’re fully back into the swing of pumpkin spice everything, midterms, and falling in love in October. Everything comes back like clockwork, but upon reflection — we’ve forgotten something. Or should I say someone . . . The SFU Pisser. Since his disappearance last September, much disdain has been had for he who pees. His silence opened up opportunities for a stream of slanderous speculation on his identity, and inspired newer, shittier bowel movements across campus. Yet, there have been no leaks of his actions since then. There are new students who don’t know his glorious legacy! The SFU Pisser was a cornerstone of our identity as SFU students for the fall 2025...