Convocating doesn’t seem worth its hefty price tag

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With all the hidden fees, you’d think we could at least get financial sponsorship from Capital One

By Rachel Braeuer
Photos by Ben Buckley

A post-secondary education may be the ticket to higher earning potential, but not before your institution bleeds you dry.

After you’ve finished your last assignment, you think it’ll be all downhill — you feel as free as you did the first time you coasted down a hill on your bike after getting your training wheels off. Then you apply for convocation and realize that unless you’ve got over $100 just kickin’ it in the bank, you won’t be crossing any stage.

With the amount of student fees lumped together and tossed at us every September, you’d think the cost of convocation would be lumped into those. While it’s true not everyone will want to cross the stage and rent regalia, lack of use doesn’t stop SFU from charging a number of other fees.

Distance students still have to pay gym membership fees and U-Pass fees. Health insurance is compulsory, too, unless you opt out, and even then you pay upfront and get a refund. What makes convocation any different?

I haven’t looked into whether there is a rationale behind these fees, and frankly I don’t care to. Do they argue added administration fees? Added work for the registrar’s office? I could understand if this wasn’t a regular occurrence, but these ceremonies happen every year, twice a year, without fail.

Making students foot the bill because SFU employees have to do extra work twice a year that I’m assuming is outlined in their job descriptions is asinine. That’s like a clothing store charging a service fee one week a year while they do inventory because their employees have to put in extra hours. If it’s a regular element of doing business, it should be factored in from the beginning, not added to your bill as you walk out the door.

Why didn’t I plan for the cost of graduation, you ask? Shouldn’t I accept responsibility for my degree? Yes, I should. But SFU should also clearly provide me with this information. If you check the “apply to graduate” website, it tells you to check out the “deadlines and fees” website to find out more about applying to graduate.

The deadlines are clearly outlined, but the fees aren’t. These aren’t disclosed until you’re logged into SIS clutching your credit card and fighting back tears thinking about the balance you’re carrying. Only then do you discover the $30 they normally charge becomes $80 if you miss the deadline, for a total of $84.73 after tax.

“At least it’s over,” you think, scouring your webmail for invitations to paid linguistic and psychology studies, contemplating checking Craigslist to see how much people will pay to kiss your feet while factoring in the cost of a pedicure. But then you receive an e-mail informing you the regalia rental cost is $30 ($157 if you want to buy the robes — “virgin for life” bumper stickers are extra, though).

What is this crap? Are graduands also secretly signed up for convocation fight club, where the first rule is you don’t talk about the fees associated with convocation fight club?

Assuming your degree takes you four years to complete, and you attend all three semesters a year, you pay student fees 12 times while going to university. If the cost of convocation is $60, SFU could charge you $5 a semester and not put you deeper in the hole at the end of your debt-gree.

Don’t want to convocate? We should put those funds in a pool for people who need the financial assistance, so everyone who wants to convocate can, just like any other “maybe you’ll use it, maybe you won’t, but pay for it anyway” fee we incur.

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