Home Humour SFU GOTHIC: The school creeps on . . .

SFU GOTHIC: The school creeps on . . .

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Written by Kelly Chia, Staff Writer

  • You are in C9000 and you hear wheels. Everyone stops talking to listen to the wheels. The sound is anywhere and everywhere. The lecture hall starts quivering.
  • You hear people talk about being trapped on the mountain in the winter. Elsewhere, the bus’s wheels have stalled on Gaglardi. You suddenly hear the quiet, long groan of students who have just been backstabbed by Road Report.
  • You are joking with a friend about the fog making SFU look like a haunted campus. The fog swallows your friend whole. You curse the campus for taking another student. It never stops taking students.
  • The students murmur that SFU is a campus community. Unbeknownst to them, the school has begun moving down the mountain slowly. We are all helpless to SFU’s descent.
  • You reach out to throw some garbage away. You see a pair of eyes and hear some scurrying. More eyes appear and blink at you, and the night is less lonely.
  • You press your iClicker’s buttons rapidly. Despite its best efforts, it cannot connect to the rumoured channel of second year classes that still use iClickers. You feel the illusion of a community in a claustrophobic classroom of people that are half-asleep. It goes. You press your iClicker’s button again, and it tuts at you.
  • You and your friend are talking about balancing your school budget. Seemingly, out of nowhere, vendors begin spawning in AQ. They will not stop looking at you. They will never, never stop looking at you.

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