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Home Humour SFU Student Bulletin: Week of October 1 – 6

SFU Student Bulletin: Week of October 1 – 6

Last one to open the weekly bulletin is a rotten egg!

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ILLUSTRATION: Courtesy of The Peak

By: Hana Hoffman, Peak Associate

Announcements

  • OCTOBER BOO-PASS NOW AVAILABLE — This spooky season, all SFU students are eligible for the limited-time BOO-Pass, which allows access to all haunted areas of the old SFU buildings. Go on, admire SFU’s boo-talist architecture, but beware of what you might see if you look too closely (as-boos-tos). Boogattis driven by ghosts will also be available in place of the campus shuttle, but there is no guarantee of where you’ll end up. 
  • CROWDED BUSES — Be sure to do your morning stretches and wear comfortable shoes to stand in if you’re taking transit because you probably won’t find a seat. We also recommend bringing gloves with a good grip so you can safely hold on to the handles during the bumpy ride or lugging a foldable lawn chair so you’ll always have your own seat reserved.

Important dates this month:

Opportunities

  • JOB POSITION AVAILABLE — We are now hiring for the sky-watching position at SFU! Since it will gradually get darker at earlier times, your role is to watch the sky every evening to see exactly what time the sun sets, then share the outcome with the SFU community. With that, students will know exactly what time to go outside the next evening to take the perfect sunset pictures to post on Instagram! And, in contrast to boring jobs out there with all that paperwork and direct deposit stuff, this position will pay you in sunset-coloured bubble teas! Deadline to submit application: National Fried Scallops Day.
  • WE NEED S’MORE S’MORE TUTORS — SFU s’moreology course offerings are struggling to keep up with the rising demand for s’more research classes. The National Institute of S’mores Committee is hiring immediately for s’more tutors to support the education of the next generation of s’moreologists who will add much-needed capacity to BC’s s’mores production system. Applications open until position filled. Eligibility: 
  1. Must have completed the following courses with a grade of 86% or higher.
  • S’more History & Evolution 101
  • Impact of S’more Availability on University Student Life 120
  • S’more Building Techniques 201
  • Chocolate, Marshmallow, and Graham Cracker Intensive Flavour Study 235

2. Must have a passion for s’more development and have conducted a minimum of 15             lab experiments

      3. Work experience as a s’more chef is an asset

Resources

  • SFU STRATEGY TO HELP PREPARE STUDENTS FOR UPCOMING EXAMS – As announced last week, final exams have been rescheduled from December 5–17 to October 16–23, which is coming up soon. We ask that students get off their Nintendo and switch to a win-tendo mindset to try achieving the highest grades possible. In preparation for exam week, we will double all lecture and tutorial durations to get that extra study time in. If your courses overlap and you can’t be in two classrooms at once, then you clearly need to catch up on your multitasking skills. Good luck!
  • For anyone who is still mentally recovering from the overwhelming crowds of young, energetic first-year students during Welcome Day, here is a 30 minute soothing meditation video to eliminate fatigue and stress and help you regain your inner peace. 

Oh, what a September to remember.

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