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First-year student finally starting to get the hang of hating university

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BURNABY — Peter Smith, a young, fresh faced student who has only been at SFU for two weeks is reportedly already settling into wanting to get out of here as soon as he possibly can.

Although he struggled in his first two weeks, Smith has, according to sources, already managed to stop being excited about his new environment and the possibility of making friends. At press time, these sources had indicated that the freshman had really turned things around and he now dreads every coming day of “all this bullshit.”

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