Ever wonder what happened to those celebrities who were everywhere back then, but have since fallen off the face of the earth? Well, stop asking yourself stupid questions and find out where they are — now!                         ­

Bigfoot

Formerly popular cryptic beast

Although Bigfoot was a star in the 20th century, making appearances in blurry photographs in all the most respected tabloids, he mysteriously fell off the world’s radar aroundthe same time that autofocus became a standard camera feature. Nowadays he’s become somewhat of a recluse, rarely appearing in public and spending most of his time at his Area 51 Ranch.

Carmen Sandiego

Elusive video game character

Sandiego spent her most prolific years on the lam as the ringleader of V.I.L.E., a criminal organization dedicated to tricking kids into learning about geography. Where in the world is she now? In 2005 Carmen was finally brought to justice for her crimes and is currently serving a life sentence at the Edna Mahan Correctional Facility for Women in Clinton, New Jersey.

Your Pokemon cards

Remember, you even had that shiny Gyarados

You probably haven’t thought about them for years, but I’m sure that all your totally rad Pokemon cards are just the way you left them: in mint condition and ready to be sold for so much money! I mean, what a great investment! Oh shit. . . never mind, they’re all worthless . . . and your mom gave them away at a yard sale . . . and you’re not going to be able to pay off those student loans now. . . . Oh well, at least you’ve still got that Beanie Baby collection: that must be worth a ton by now!

By Brad McLeod