Other SFSS Presidential Candidates

Screen Shot 2016-03-18 at 2.05.13 PM

The Avocado

  • I’ll decide once and for all what I am
  • Free sex ed
  • List of sex positions inscribed inside me
  • Stop making fun of me



  • More garbage around campus. We need food, and garbage pickup is too efficient for us to scavenge with current levels
  • We demand a separate raccoon residence
  • New faculty of raccoon studies.


Chad Douchewinkle

  • Dining hall serves all-you-can-drink beer
  • Beer gardens on campus
  • No open liquor laws on campus
  • More keggers



The Dark Lord Sauron

  • Increased advocacy
  • Clearer communication
  • Increased student services
  • More student engagement


Spot the dog

  • “Woof”
  • “Ruff”
  • “Bow-wow”
  • “Bark”
Photo credits:
Intoconnection (Youtube)
The Peak (Youtube)
Guy W. Wicke (Flickr)
OhMyGeek! (Youtube)
Albert Herring (Wikipedia)